Slowly making a comeback to blog regularly !

I know I rarely update, but this time I'll try to update at least once a week... anyway everything has been good. I have lots of new things to blog in regards to my spiritual life and just some amazing things that I've learned....I just remain astounded by how one can mature...this was and is still a season of pruning and plucking the things that hinders me from growing more spiritually.. I'll post more later on this week or the next.

Lots of exciting things coming soon!

Missing.

Ah, How I've missed writing....there will never be a better therapy, than letting yourself go with words, letting your emotions out, pouring out the thoughts and feelings that will always linger in your heart, and soul....

Lately, I've been in a rut. Not producing any fruit, and yes this haunts me. This makes me wonder sometimes, how can one have such high zeal, then bam its gone as if it was never there in the first place. Therefore I've come up with several conclusions:

• I have no perseverance therefore I must develop this
• I get caught up with life, and I just dont seem to take a pause and focus on the better things
• Laziness.... enough said on that one.
• I simply dont make the choice to do so.

No, I'm not putting out excuses, I'm merely trying to find the root of what makes me fall into this behavior of distancing myself from my walk with God. Well, even so I certainly feel that I've missed out on many blessings and opportunities. But here is the most beautiful part of all that will keep me coming back to God and hopefully one day this behavioral pattern will stop but as of now, what will always bring me back is redemption. His love and forgiveness... he never walks away from us, we are the ones that walk away.....

Ah yes, I have missed writing, yes, this is one of the things that have been missing in my life...

Time truly speaks for itself...

Every year a day before my birthday, I like to do a review of my life... starting from being a child, to pre-adolescent, to teenager, to now finally an Adult. An adult of 20 years of age. I've always been an avid writer, so I've kept journals. Journals since I was 8 til now 19. I like to read them and simply dwell on that moment. Tho, every year I am flabbergasted by how much I have learned and matured over the years in regards to life, and how I literally changed so much over the years.... Spiritually, Emotionally, and mentally.

There is truly a time for everything, but time in itself is nothing but a season... Life goes by us far too quickly.... so the question is... are we truly living a life worthy of living? Are we really living a life that pleases and honors God? Are we trying our hardest to seek out our calling? Are we seeking his face? reading his word? living his word? are we an example to others?

It is truly an honor and pleasure in God letting me have another year of life...In 1 hour I will be 20. Thank you Lord for letting me breathe 20 years of life, and of those to come. I will continue to strive in placing you 1st above all things....Abba Father Thank you for choosing to love me. ♥

Balance is the essence...

Has anyone stopped to notice how in a strange way, everything is balanced? How having too much of one thing is harmful. Just like Water... it is the source of life, it keeps us alive, it gives plants life, and it gives animals life. But when there is too much water there will be flooding. It suffocates plants, and suffocates us humans. Or fire ? it can keeps us warm in a cold and remote area, but when exposed too closely we will get burn, or much more consequently it can kill us. This can be said spiritually. Many follow what man says, thus never comparing it to what has been written in the Bible. Or vice versa, some can become legalistic, and follow the bible all too closely in a manner that does not bless the other person but chase them away...Or when one relies solely on the spiritual things... this can be dangerous because when one would think that they "heard" the Holy Spirit speak it might've not been because they didn't line it up with the word of God. So, this would cause many wrong choices, and just a grand mess of things...

So make sure there is balance in your life, are you just relying on the laws that were written in the Bible, but you don't spend time with Our heavenly Father hearing his voice? Or are you relying too much on this "voice" but not lining it up with the word of God? Or quite simply, are you just going to church and hearing week after week all of these sermons, yet not living a life of example? It can sometimes be a difficult to balance everything....but there is way. =)

The High Value of Fellowship.

Fellowship, a wonderful opportunity where one begins to interact with the other person in a way where one would socialize, spend time, and a time where you begin to know that person. But most importantly it is through fellowship that one would establish relationships with other people. But sadly, in today's society, the word relationship has been tainted, spat on, and disrespected. Whether it is from a person using another person financially, or men and women that form relationships to hurt another person, to simply being a mere tool of instant gratification. (Sexually)... Relationships today have no value... this can be said with the high divorce rate and violence today. BUT obviously, one cannot simply blame them.. for they were not taught correctly. One must have a strong foundation over the aspects of life.

Think about this, Jesus came to earth to be in fellowship with everyone especially those, that needed that 'friend' to help them. Despite being the son of a living God, he came to serve, to help, to edify. He was and is still one who would only look for the best interest of the person. Not his own. If everyone for once would STOP being selfish. I guarantee the world would be a tad bit better. So, instead of thinking what you want... think of what the other person needs. It always better to feel that good feeling of knowing you made a difference in another person's life, even in the smallest ways as to helping your neighbor take out their trash, or making a child smile with a batch of homemade cookies, or even passing by an elderly woman's home and ask if she needs anything....

For one does not know the struggles that one may be going through and maybe, Just maybe that small detail will give them the belief to think, that someone out there was thinking of them. To just know that, you would looking out for THEIR interest. That is the high value of fellowship.

The Power of Deciding....

I've noticed something..... although at times when one may be unhappy, guilty, shameful, whatever the negative emotion that is being expressed.... One makes the choice to be that way.. it is up to the person to decide for them to be that way. The same applies for positive emotions. So it is up to us! We hold the power to decide. This is another great example of how we live in constant decision making. BUT sometimes in order to achieve that we must allow help to come in, yes one may decide not to be unhappy anymore. But what will be our source of everything that is opposite to negativity? Today in my devotional I was captured by this;

It's up to you.

"Behold I stand at the door, and knock: If any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come to him" Revelation 3:20 KJV A man named Holman Hunt depicted a painting of this verse, but he added one tiny detail that goes overlooked. The door was only to be opened by the inside.....

The Source? Jesus. Who not better than the man who is Love himself? who expressed himself, who defined himself, who IDENTIFIES himself as a God who loves? and what does love bring us? Happiness, the joy and satisfaction of knowing there is someone out there who thinks of us highly in their best interest, and will do anything for our own good no matter what the cost.

Second Chances are a beautiful thing...

Choices, life is full of them, there is no way of escaping it... and when it comes down to it, we either make a good choice or a bad choice. I am a newlywed 19 years of age. Say, or think what you may about me being too young, it does not matter, for I only value the opinion of 1 person. (God) Anyway, I've made some choices and although it was going to happen later... I took the approach of it being sooner rather than later. Thus (Getting married) Yes, He and I are very happy of course =) but I fear, that, out of the reproach of it being sooner, that we will face obstacles, and challenges that were not meant to occur. Will I be ready?

As it turns out I'm not. It begins with my family. They are hurt, and very upset with me. I don't know how long it will take for everything and everyone to be on good terms... but I know it will be a while... Although I was not ready for them, I am finding and searching my strength in God and his word. Spiritually, I feel hurt, my heart feels heavy, and I feel as if I am carrying their burden... until today.... Where I found peace even if it was for a moment...

Today in my devotional, in the selection that I chose to read said this:

A good choice

You've made some bad choices in your life, haven't you? You've chosen the wrong friends, or the wrong career, etc.. You look back over your life and say "If only....If only... I could make up for those bad choices" You can. One good choice for eternity offsets a thousands of bad ones on earth."

It was during that calm, and peaceful moment, that I was reminded of how even in the midst of incorrect choices God will always find a way to transform it into a good. Everything happens for a reason, and I will make sure that out of this choice it will bring many blessings to those around me, and bring God glory with my marriage... =)